It's always hard for someone to completely understand that I have a chronic disease. They hear it, they may know it....but they never really get it. I'm positive that this is something all Type 1's deal with and often. Why? Because we look like nothing is wrong. That's the kicker. Perception is reality & people perceive me as being a healthy young woman.
Yea...that's right! I said young!!! Shush!
Here's my most recent battle with disregard. Many of you know that I was laid off in April. Being laid off sucks for everyone but especially for someone with a chronic disease. Being laid off means being cut off from assistance with obtaining medical supplies. Luckily for me, Doc B was beyond fabu, as he always is. He gave me as many free samples & refills as possible before I was completely denied coverage. Needless to say, it's almost February and I'm just now running out. I owe Doc B huge! The BEST Endo I ever had the privilege of knowing.
I started working in October which made me eligible for health insurance in January. Hurrah! I'll take it! I'll do it! I don't care that I made more on unemployment, I would have benefits! That's what matters most to people with chronic diseases. Not the pay. Not the tasks. Not the co-workers. Not the schedule. Nothing matters....just coverage. That's it. I would gladly shovel shit for 10 hours a day at minimum wage if I were promised health benefits. It's true.
I'm not saying I'd be happy about it but I'd do it. I wouldn't have a choice now, would I? Nope.
Well, January rolled around and I had a Dr. appt, I had the Pharmacist on stand by just waiting to hand over my meds, I had relief on the horizon, safety at my scarred fingertips, my good health just a breath away.....then it was gone.
Yes. Gone. I was told that I wouldn't be able to get benefits because they missed the deadline. Ummm....what? You've had 3 months of knowledge that I was here & eligible. It's not like I was a big surprise thrown in your lap one January morning. I've been saying I couldn't wait to get benefits, that I was running out of meds, that I had a Dr. appt. I even took the day off for the Dr. appt. soooo....huh? Small town. Small company. HUGE disregard.
Once again....I had been douched. Then it hit me. People really don't get it. This isn't about getting a flu shot or breast implants. This isn't about getting my teeth cleaned or vitamins. This is about life juice.
Without it......there is no life.
Period. New line.
It's funny to me that I came home and I was so happy that I found a job and a boyf. I thought 'I was meant to be home! This was meant to be! YES!' Only to have both of those things douche me 3 months later. Awesome how life lessons never end.
I have to laugh though because I'm totally Murphy's Law. I have known this over half of my life. I have grown used to laughing about it because there is, in fact, humor in everything. Even pain, loss, disappointment...and douching. Letting it defeat me would go against everything I am as a person so I don't. This, of course, after the tears dry and the stress lessens..a bit.
I carry on.
And kick life's ass.
I now have a new job, benefits on the horizon, a fab new Dr. & lovely Pharmacist waiting. Side note: New Dr. quoted Princess Bride. How could I not love him? New Pharmacist is a doll face who referred me to him & is always willing to help. Kudos to them both.
I have had unbelievable kindness from friends, old and new, offering everything from money to meds to cawfee. Mmm....cawfee. That's some pretty fabulous karma...to be loved. So, a big thanks to my life heroes. A big puffy heart to you.
And a big GFYS to those who just don't get it.
As a big believer in karma, I have no doubt that what comes around....goes around....so hang on tight.